There is no lousy weather, only lousy choice of clothing.

Sorry, I can’t hang out. My auntie’s cousin’s brother in law’s best friend’s accountant’s roommate’s pet goldfish died. Some other time maybe.

Whenever four New Yorkers get into a cab together with no arguing, a bank has just been robbed.

Of course you’re not fat. Just grab a couple of chairs and come sit with us.

The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.