My goal this weekend is to move… just enough so people don’t think I’m dead.

If pro is the opposite of con, what would then be the opposite of progress?

If you’re hotter than me, then that means I’m cooler than you.

If you want to keep a true perspective of your own importance, get a dog that will worship you and a cat that will scorn you.

If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times: Don’t exaggerate!